Melanie Blake promises to share the good the bad and the ugly from her glamorous life
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So the reaction to this column has been pretty amazing – I’ve loved getting all your letters, emails and comments, even the bad ones! But the one reaction that I didn’t prepare for was anyone that I wrote about actually reading it. Call me naive, but for some reason it just didn’t even cross my mind.
That is, until a message was sent to the Notebook mailbox from my ex-fiancé (those of you who have been reading this column from the start will remember that I wrote about how he left me at the altar five years earlier and, after my anger and rage at the situation, we ceased all communication. I changed my number and blocked him on all social media accounts).
Now, there he was, sitting in my inbox.
He said he had read the columns and that he desperately wanted to see me. He added that what he had to say wasn’t appropriate for an email and would I agree to meet up with him to hear him out.
(Image: Getty Images/iStockphoto)
Oh reader, I cannot tell you what a shock that was. When I shared what I did, it was with the aim of helping anyone else that had a broken heart to realise that you would eventually get over it. And, in truth, I have, or I wouldn’t have felt able to write about it so honestly all these years later (because it’s pretty humiliating to admit being jilted at the altar).
So I found myself with a huge dilemma. Here was the man that I’d once thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with, who hurt me like no other man has done before or after, and that blocking out of my life, no sight or sound, with no form of communication for nearly half a decade, had helped me to close the door on a painful part of my past. And boy was it painful.
So now having realised that I’d stirred the hornets’ nest, in a literary sense, was I under an obligation, since everyone now knew what he’d done, to agree to this meeting?
And if I did agree to meet him, what would happen? Would seeing his face take me straight back to the humiliation I felt that day? It had been a painful few years of recovery and another bumpy few years of self-rediscovery to even get back into the dating game in the years since that fateful day.
(Image: Getty Images/iStockphoto)
While I’d never found love like I’d had with him since, I’d also never experienced the pain that his behaviour had caused me. I looked at the email over and over again, wondering what to do and then I finally made the decision. Despite not intentionally meaning to reignite any actual contact with the man that was once meant to be my husband, the fact that I had put “our story” out there and had my say publicly meant it felt morally like the right thing to let him say whatever it was he wanted to say to me personally.
So after a few more days of procrastinating I eventually replied, giving him a time and place that I would meet him (I didn’t give him options, I didn’t feel he deserved them). Within minutes a reply had confirmed that he would be there. It had been decided we were to meet again.
A week later, I walked up the steps to London’s Langham hotel – a place where we used to have dinner together often.
I entered the beautiful lobby with its ginormous marble pillars and opulent fresh flowers and looked towards the doorway that would lead to where I knew he would be waiting.
With one quick glance I checked my reflection in the huge ornate mirror that hangs to the side as you walk through the lobby. I was five years older and I hoped a hell of a lot wiser and finally ready to hear him out…
Has an ex ever reached out to you after years of silence? Email me and tell me what happened at firstname.lastname@example.org
Follow Melanie online @MelanieBlakeUK on Twitter and @melanieblakeuk on Instagram